No Cough Drops in the Teachers' Room

I was told today that we couldn't have cough drops in the teachers' room. One of the staff let me know that having cough drops, cough drop wrappers or anything like that was not permitted. I just bought a huge bag of cough drops yesterday and was trying to get my throat in better condition before I have to start teaching full bore in the weeks to come. I was told it was because the cough drops look like candy and it sets a bad example for kids.

I guess the plan for me to heal myself with a few throat candies has been put in the deep freezer of doom. I have no idea what to do now about my throat. Sometimes I wonder if schools here are not a bit too uptight about these sorts of rules. I am an adult, and I am not a student, therefore rules that apply to students shouldn't necessarily apply to me.

For example, when students ride bicycles to school they wear helmets and teachers don't. Students wear uniforms and teachers don't. But I suppose cough drops in the teachers' room is just one of those things that cannot be tolerated. I guess I'll have to find some liquid cough medicine or some sort of drink that helps with a sore throat. If any of you who read this site have any suggestions, let me know.

Remember: No cough drops in the teacher's room!

Bishi Bashi

Today I had 4 classes. Normally I keep it under three because my throat starts to kill me after the third class. But because this school is smaller than my other one I teach more. I have less time at this school so I figure that I should visit the classes more often.

Anyway, today I taught with a very strict teacher whom I appreciate. Let's call her BishiBashi-sensei. Now, you may be wondering what "bishi bashi" actually is. I actually learned this term from bishibashi-sensei. She demonstrated it in the class and asked me to participate in the bishi bashi bash!
Basically bishi bashi is the act of "roughing up" students who are naughty. By roughing up, I mean slapping, pushing, jiggling and wiggling. None of it is done to hurt the kids. It's more like a quick reminder for them to act better and not be naughty. The first time I saw bishibashi-sensei break out with the ninja smack down I was shocked. My jaw dropped and I couldn't believe what I was seeing. It looked so much like corporal punishment to me. She was smacking them on the back, on the chest, on the head, on the arms and so on. She'd go off on a tirade yelling at a boy, jerk this poor boy up and wiggle him like a rag doll.

I personally don't get involved in the bishi bashi but occasionally she asks me to join in. I usually just laugh but one or two times she sort of forced me into the tag team bishi bashi. I never take it as far as she does because I don't feel it is appropriate. But I can say this, when her students graduate they are some of the top kids. Bishibashi-sensei keeps them engaged, prevents them from being lazy, makes sure that every student does their homework, does well on tests and is an overall positive influence on them.

Today Bishibashi-sensei put the bishi bashi bounce on a couple of kids. She especially targets the boys that represent the naughtiest of the naughty. She goes after any boy who doesn't do his homework, talks in class, doesn't sit up straight and doesn't act appropriate. She's like shark chomping down on a seal carcass. It's a site to see.

Manga マンガ (comic book) Disturbance

Today in class I had to teach two groups of second grade students, 2 nensei (二年生). I split the two classes so that I spend 25 minutes in each class. I do this so that I can visit their classes more often rather than visiting classes once a week or once every two weeks.

The Japanese English teacher and I went to the class and began our normal routine. We were reviewing the textbook because the teacher was so far ahead with the material. So we started from page one, and I had students read aloud the textbooks whilst their classmates followed along.

Normally I pick a student and then rotate in a random order so that I can easily catch students who are not paying attention. I just randomly call out students names from our roll chart on the podium in the front of the class. I find this keeps students focused as they never know when they are going to be called to read.
Well today I busted one boy, let's call him Slam Dunk (スラムダンク,) , after a popular comic マンガ (manga). Slam Dunk is normally a very good student. He makes excellent marks on tests and does fairly well at paying attention and participating. This morning however he was distracted and didn't know where we were in the textbook when I called out his name. It soom became apparent why he wasn't able to follow. I saw that he had placed a comic マンガ(manga) atop his textbook. Normally I would just ask them to put away their private books or comics and continue on with the lesson.

Slam Dunk however disturbed the flow of the class so I called him on his mistake. I didn't scold him per se, I simply told him that reading comics in class is against the rules and I asked him to bring his comic to the front so that I could confiscate it. Doing this brought back memories of my own childhood when I had comics, novels, and even a Sony Walkman taken because I was using them in class. So I understood where he was coming from.

Later after class I asked Slam Dunk to come out to the hallway and I reiterated my point for taking his comic マンガ (manga). He seemed to understand but he told me that he wasn't reading the comic. He had only had it out on his desk, sitting atop his textbook. I tended to believe that he wasn't reading it but I told him that if he wants to have a comic he should only read it between classes and at lunch.

I am all for reading, even comics. It's always good when children read no matter how simple or irrelevant the material contained within. However, disturbing a class by reading is not and should not be tolerated. I hope I didn't make Slam Dunk hate me for getting on him. I am without a doubt sure that he is pissed off at me right now. I guess time will tell if he will get over it.

The Strange Boy - Dopey-kun

There's a boy in my school is very odd. And when I mean odd, I don't mean geeky, nerdy, or anything like that. By odd, I mean he doesn't talk much, he stares at you like he could kill you, and he mopes along in such a dejected and belligerent way that you wonder if he's running on empty. I can tell there is something seriously wrong with this kid mentally. In class he just slumps in his desk and sleeps. He is now a 3rd grader and for the past two years he has kept this attitude. But his eyes paint the picture of a potential killer. I could easily see this kid going off the deep end and slaughtering one of his classmates.
Teachers have basically given up on him and are waiting for him to graduate as he is considered completely incorrigible. They let him sleep through the entire class without saying a word. Most of his classmates ignore him though I have seen him chatting it up with one or two students. He walks around the hallways during classes, he often goes home early or whenever he feels like it. If he gets scolded he just leaves the school. I suppose odd is really an understatement.

I think he has a bad home life. I was so concerned that I started asking about him to a fellow teacher. That teacher told me the background of this kid, let's call him Dopey-kun. She said Dopey-kun's father is a police officer and he is very hard on his son. She told me that his dad swears at him, berates him and makes him feel really small. I quickly asked if she thought Dopey-kun was being beaten by his father at home. She said she wasn't sure but couldn't rule anything out.

She went on to tell me that Dopey-kun's mom had ran away and he was an only child. That got me to thinking that this kid might have just been dealt a raw deal in life. After hearing all this stuff about Dopey-kun, I kind of felt sorry for him. That is until one day this week when Dopey-kun became far less Dopey and decided to yell at me for seemingly no reason.

I was walking down the hall chatting up students left and right. I normally ask them how they are, what they are doing, where they are going and the like. Sometimes I'll stop and spend a few more minutes talking to students who are eager to communicate with me. Today, I just happened to stop by a group that Dopey-kun had been hanging out with. I started asking lots of questions and it got a bit lively in the discussion.
Well I guess someone had pissed in Dopey-kun's okonomiyaki （お好み焼き）because he was in a raw and extremely bad mood. He started to yell at me and told me in essence to shut my mouth. Well, Big Booger-sensei doesn't ever take any lip from any snot half his age, and I just started talking louder and louder, throwing in a few melodies and whistling and even doing a little dance in the hallway. I guess this really pissed off Dopey-kun because he just took off down the hall pouting all the way back to the classroom.

I normally would never act that immature, but I think that kid needed a real dose of his own medicine. I never am violent with children. I prefer instead to "whip" them with kindness. When I come into contact with a smart mouth or a rude kid, I simply pour on the charm and act very kind to all around that kid. But I typically ignore the troublemaker. This usually solves the issue or causes the troublemaker to skedaddle as it did with Dopey-kun.

Hit By A Car

Today after lunch I had to run an errand to the post office. Once a month I have to go to the main post office in the downtown area. I let the Kocho-sensei and Kyoto-sensei know that I was leaving and would be back soon.

So I peddled off and headed to the post office. There are several routes to take to get to the post office from my school, but I usually stick to the very narrow roads where only pedestrians and two-wheelers can travel as it generally is the safest way to go. Turns out that bit of logic might not be as sound as I once had thought.

Whilst riding at a normal pace, thinking about what I needed to get done at the post office, I quickly realized how truly unsound my thinking had been. I had not gotten far from my school, maybe a half a kilometer, when it happened. I don't know why she didn't see me. It's not like I am a tiny little man or anything.

I got side-swiped by a 4-door Diahatsu kei-car （軽自動車）, kei being a vehicle with less than a 660cc engine and meeting certain tiny dimensions, loaded up with a mother, her baby, and a granny. The mother was driving, the baby and granny were strapped up in the back seat and I got a real up close and personal look at the interior of the vehicle.

The woman just blew through an intersection that I just happened to be peddling through. It happened in an instant, and I didn't have a second to react. Her car skidded right into the left side of my whole body, slamming into my bicycle, and I, being a hefty American, held my ground and somehow managed not to fall down. I just sort of impacted the car and took the entire force without being knocked down or falling.

At first I was stunned. I just got hit by a car which turned out to be my first accident in Japan. I didn't know how to react for a micro-second. So I just sat there looking. I remember now hearing the crunch of the car slamming into me and seeing the look of terror in the mother's eyes. She looked so terrified, much like an animal you'd see on National Geographic in the jaws of some beasty predator.

Suddenly I wheeled by startled and shaking body around to the side of the car, checked my knees and arms, gave my bike a once over and then I told the mother and granny that I was fine. I said it was no problem. They asked me if I was sure and I said, "No worries." I then peddled off and they continued on their way.

Later I noticed that the front tire on my bike was a bit wobbly but it's nothing major. I might take it down to the shop where I bought it and see if the owner can repair it if it even needs to be repaired. I went ahead to the post office and while there called my wife and told her about what had happened. She asked me if I was all right and I said I was fine. I was very lucky that the lady wasn't driving an old clunker made from some 60s era steel, or wasn't driving wrecklessly. She was speeding but not too aggressively and that's what saved me from injury, prevented my bicycle from being crumpled and left her car unscathed.

Mexican Cornbread From the Potluck Party

Just thought I would post up a picture of the Mexican Cornbread that I made for the potluck party that we went to on Sunday near the Kakogawa River. So without further adieu:


Big Booger can mix it up quite well in the kitchen we he gets an inkling to do so. Also I might as well post up another image of the food from the party to give you poor readers something to salivate over:

Sunday Potluck Party

This Sunday my wife and I went to a recreational spot situated parallel to the Kakogawa River （加古川の川）that's about 10 minutes from our house. We were to meet several friends and have a potluck get-together out on the field near the river. When we arrived no one was there. It turned out one of the gathers was running late due to the train being late. So we waited for a few minutes, and eventually they all showed up in a vehicular caravan, just like you'd see a line of camels marching through a desert in the Middle East.

One by one they entered the park, but the parking lot was pretty much full by this time. We managed to snag a nice spot near the entrance so we could easily exit when the partying was over but the rest of the entourage had to park along a curved section of the lot.
They quickly disembarked and we were setting up tents, tables and getting our spot situated. The men did the heavy lifting, and the women went to work spreading out the potluck pabulum. It was all up and over in less than 20 minutes.

It turned out to be a very excellent day for an outdoor event. The sun was out in full force like Luke Skywalker and his light saber. It was an idyllic day, roughly 22-23 degrees, brief gusts of spring-like wind, and a few whispy clouds much like the tafts of hair sliding across a bald man's brow.

The food was awesome. There were spring rolls, fried chicken, dips, sushi, chips, cookies, cakes, Chinese dishes like sweet and sour pork and all manners of side dishes. I personally whipped up two batches of vegetarian Mexican cornbread. Why two batches you ask? Well it's because one I make for the whimps who can't handle spicey food whilst the other one is for those who like to have welts and blisters on their tongue. My wife mixed up a fine spinach dip, that I latered munched on when we were home. It was a heavenly mix of great food and tasty snacks.

Everyone got on rather well, there were a few beer drinkers in the mix, unfortunately for me I couldn't imbibe due to driving to the location. There were about 20 members who joined the party and of those about 6 were non-Japanese. Most everyone spoke in a mixture of Japanese and English. A couple of times we were lost in translation, especially a word that vexed even a few Japanese-English teachers: 肩が狭い　(kata ga semai) which literally translates as narrow shoulders. But the meaning is more along the lines of "to feel small in or with something." As in, I screw up at work, and all of a sudden I start to feel small around my co-workers. There were other words and expressions but I have since forgotten them.

One member broke out with a kite and started flying it high above our tent. He got it as high as his spool of string would allow, which was roughly around 200-300 meters. This lured an old man to our group. He was also flying a kite nearby and had noticed that there were foreigners where we were "potlucking" it. So he moseyed over to our group and started chatting up the kite flyer. He stayed for a few minutes but before he sauntered off he gave one of the female foreigners a four leaf clover.

First Graders Cooking Contest(１年生の料理のコンテスト)

Yesterday the first graders had their cooking contest outside in the courtyard of our school. About 280 first grade student (一年生) gathered in small groups around the edge of our school courtyard, which by the way is covered with green artificial turf, the type you'd typically see in a sports stadium.

From 11:00am until well after 3:00pm students, teachers and staff were busy as Japanese June bugs. At first it looked more like an organized bit of chaos, but slowly it precipitated into a rather enjoyable time for all involved.

I had forgotten to tell my wife not to prepare my boxed lunch (お弁当) for that day, so I brought it and had to eat it at lunch. I also got accosted by about 48 groups to sample their cooking. It goes without saying that I was stuffed like a 100 kilogram turkey once it was all said and done. Students cooked up 3 dishes per group which actually meant that I sampled around 164 different dishes. By the time I got halfway around the place I was sick and didn't feel like I could move.
Most students stuck to the usual dishes. There were several different Japanese pizzas (お好み焼き). piles of hamburger steaks (sometimes like a Salsbury steak), (ハンバーグステキ), rolled cabbage, fried potatoes and so on. But there were a few surprises in the sea of sameness. For instance two groups made naan and curry homemade without an oven and cooked on a barbecue grill, which surprised me. Two groups made homemade western-style pizzas, another group made blueberry smoothies and three groups had whipped up some crepes.
Most of the food was quite good but I have to admit there were some stinkers in the lot. One really bad tasting Japanese pizza (お好み焼き) had the consistency of concrete dipped cardboard. In fact it was so hard I had to skip sampling it, much to the disappointment of the group that made it. My teeth are important to me and I just couldn't justify risking a chipped molar for easing that group's disappointment. Another group had somehow gotten charcoal(炭） dust in one of their dishes, so I pointed it out and used that as an excuse to skip the sampling (though I did try their other two dishes that didn't have the dust in it.)
Afterward I wrestled around with a group of 5 little boys who ganged up on me in a WWF sort of way. They attacked from all sides and they zapped the energy completely out of my body. I don't know where these kids get their energy, but I am starting to suspect that they might have some sort of nuclear core that keeps them going longer than an energizer bunny. It was an all around good time, but when I got home in the evening I had to take a one-hour nap before my evening class due to being drained of energy from the day's events.

School Trip 学年旅行 & Utter Boredom

The 2nd and 3rd graders at my school have each taken 学年旅行 (school year trip). The 2nd graders are traveling to Hiroshima 広島 to see the Peace Memorial Museum/Atomic Bomb Museum and experience rafting. They left this morning at 7am and won't be back for two days.

The 3rd graders are embarking on an even grander adventure to Okinawa 沖縄. Each year the third grade students take off on a trip usually in the spring. For the past ten years they have visited Okinawa. Okinawa is to Japan what Hawaii is to America. It's the resort and beach adventure for Japanese who want to escape and enjoy the steamy weather of tropical Okinawa.

The 3rd graders left this morning at 10am from Kobe Airport. They will fly to Naha, and from there they have 3 full days of events planned.

For those of you reading who think this sounds like fun, the reality is it's more like a tour from hell. Prior to the trip, the teachers and students spent 3 or 4 days preparing for their journey. They went to the gym and practiced boarding the airplane, they practiced marching in line, getting on a train, and so on. Some teachers used bullhorns and timers to check their speed, and several students were scolded severely for being slow.

Teachers have it rough as well. They usually have to guard the students at night until the wee hours of the morning to make sure no incidents occur. That means taking turns standing guard outside the rooms, monitoring toilet breaks and god knows what else. Students get maybe 2 hours a day for free excursion time as all other activities are scripted to the letter. They won't be going to the beach at all, even though they will be in a very beautiful beached area. It's more like a military tour of duty than a school trip.

The second graders will suffer much the same sort of experience as well. Though their trip will be even more depressing as they will visit that Peace Memorial Museum which shows the tragedies of the atomic bomb and see those horrendous photos of WWII.

So that leaves me stuck at work with nothing to do. The first graders are in the gymnasium all day today. They are receiving lectures about this and that and they will have a cooking contest tomorrow. I will be a judge and get to eat 7 or 8 different kinds of dishes. But for today I am bored out of my gord. Needless-to-say it has been rather Zen like today, and I have gotten some peace whilst being in the teachers room. For three hours today I have been the only soul in the teachers room and it has been rather nice. The weather is great, so I think I will take a walk today after lunch to stretch my legs.

Pub Crawling & Bicycling Drunk

On Friday I had a full day of classes and then afterward I had a night class for two hours. Before the night class, I usually go home to prepare and then drive to the location for teaching at night. Well, this Friday a friend of mine who lives in the same building had asked me for a ride as he teaches at the same location only to a different group of students.

As I was going there anyway, I told him it'd be no problem for him to ride with me. So we go to class and afterwards he asks me if I have eaten. I hadn't so he asks me if I want to go get something. I told him that I'd have to check in with my wife to see if she had cooked. If she had, I couldn't go but if not, I'd be keen on getting a bite to eat.

We then go home, I dart upstairs and ask my wife if she had made dinner. She said she hadn't because she was too tired. So I ask her if she wants to go out with us, and she says to me no, but that it's ok for me to go.
I and my friend decide we're going to get some sushi and beers at a kaiten (kaiten is basically a round or oval table with a conveyor belt on it that brings plates of sushi around the restaurant for customers to remove at their pleasure) sushi joint about 10 minutes from where we live. We proceed to chow down and in the process kick back a few beers.

Afterward my friend mentions this bar that's located about 15 minutes from the sushi place. So I agree and we cycle off to this bar. When we arrive, it's this cave-like trendy bar for 20 somethings, filled to the brim with salary workers, office ladies, and several hippy looking kids. We slide up to the bar counter, take two seats and order up. My friend goes headlong into a bottle of California wine, whilst I stayed on the beer line. I ordered up a Heartland beer made by Kirin Brewery. If you've never had a Heartland beer you should give it a go, it's smooth, tasty, and full of flavor. It comes in a green bottle, and is quite palatable.

Anyway, after the second Heartland, I decide to mix it up a bit and get a glass of Guinness, followed quickly by a Corona and then a few more Heartlands. By this time my friend has just polished off his second bottle of wine, we've made friends with about 10 patrons of the bar, as well as the staff. We get introduced to nearly every one and have a thoroughly good time. A few other foreigners pop in later in the night and it just turns into one big party.

So we finally leave this bar at around 3:30 or so, and I am thinking we are heading home. We get about 500 meters from the previous bar when we spot another and just decide to pop in for one more beer. This other place is sort of older and is sort of packed for it being 4am on Saturday morning. We proceed to chat up the barkeep and a couple of other patrons. We even run into some other patrons from the other bar.

We finally exit that place by which time we are both far too drunk to even walk much less ride a bicycle home, which is well over 20 minutes away. So we start peddling and swerving around like two clowns from a bicycle rodeo. When it happens. All of a sudden I lose control and go down smacking the concrete like a ton of bricks. I freeze for a second because I am in the middle of the road, which luckily was empty of any and all traffic. The sun is creeping up over the horizon and here I am in the middle of the road, knocked down with my bicycle laying on top of me, and then I notice that my hand is all bloody and my right knee and elbow are all grated like Parmesan cheese. I stumble up, and we press on home.

Lessons learned that night, don't over drink or pub crawl and if you do over drink, definitely don't try to bicycle home.

Castella カステラ & the kyoto-sensei

I had three classes today, 1 in the morning and two in the afternoon. I would have had four classes but one got cancelled. It was a pretty good day with a lot of my antics coming out, perhaps I'll discuss those crazy antics in a later post, but today was a decent day made even better by a little gift from kyoto-sensei (vice-principal).

As I mentioned in my previous post about kyoto-sensei coming by, he came by again today this. Only today he was bearing gifts. I was sort of taken aback because he usually doesn't bring gifts.
In his hand be brought a package, a small package with this emperor looking guy on it. So I was sort of curious about it. He sat down at the desk near mine. He started explaining who the guy was.

It turns out he was one of the first Emperors of Japan, Tokugawa Ieyasu (徳川家康). More about this intriguing figure of Japanese history below:

Tokugawa Ieyasu (previously spelled Iyeyasu) (徳川 家康, Tokugawa Ieyasu (previously spelled Iyeyasu)^? January 31, 1543 – June 1, 1616) was the founder and first shogun of the Tokugawa shogunate of Japan which ruled from the Battle of Sekigahara in 1600 until the Meiji Restoration in 1868. Ieyasu seized power in 1600, received appointment as shogun in 1603, abdicated from office in 1605, but remained in power until his death in 1616.

Anyway, he goes on to tell about Portuguese traders who were allowed in Japan at the time, when practically the rest of the world were blocked from entering Japan until Perry came in and got rid of that practice.

Before he could finish explaining the story, the kyoto-sensei got a call and then he became very busy so he couldn't finish. He told me to enjoy the box of castella, and have a good rest of the day. So, I took the castella home and will eat it after dinner.

In case you are wondering what exactly castella is:

Castella or Kasutera (Japanese: カステラ) is a sponge cake made of sugar, flour, eggs, and starch syrup. It is popular at festivals and as a street food in Japan. Now a specialty of Nagasaki, the cake is thought to be originally from Spain, brought by way of Portuguese merchants in the 16th century. The name is derived from Portuguese pão de Castella, meaning "bread from Castile". Castella cake is usually sold in long boxes, with the cake inside being approximately 27cm long. It is somewhat similar to English madeira cake, also associated with Portugal. Note that there are similar types of sponge cakes named after the same fashion, in French: Pain d'Espagne, in Italian: Pan di Spagna, in Greek: Pantespani (Castile is a former kingdom of Spain comprising its central provinces, thus "Pain d'Espagne' is quasi synonymous to "bread from Castile").

View more about Castella on Wikipedia: English | Japanese

Kyoto-Sensei, Vice Principal & Golden Week Chat

In Japan, vice principals are called Kyoto-sensei (教頭先生). At most junior high schools and senior high schools in Japan there is typically only one kyoto-sensei (教頭先生) and one principal koucho-sensei (校長先生). However in America, the system which I am familiar, there can be anywhere from 1-5 vice-principals, and typically only one principal.

Well anyway, my kyoto-sensei (that's what we call him), whereas in America they typically call a vice-principal Mr. BlahBlahBlah, is a very kindly and sincere type. He is very easy going, doesn't get angry very often, works diligently and is always available whenever you need him. He was an economics teacher keizai, (経済) (けいざい) and also has made it a habit to study English. He comes by my desk which is about 30 feet or 10 meters from his to have a little chat.

Today he came by to ask about my Golden Week. I didn't have any morning classes today so I was buried in some reading that I wanted to catch up on before my afternoon classes. So he crept up on me like an old rhino needing to take a piss in the Serengeti. He asked in a peep-like voice, "Big Booger sensei, how was your Golden Week? Did you go anywhere?" To which I replied, "I didn't do a thing this Golden Week. I just slept for about 10 hours a day." I then got curious about what he did for Golden Week, so I asked him, "What about you?"

Note: Golden Week is a series of holidays at the end of April and beginning of May that typically constitute only 3-4 days, and not necessarily a full week of holiday. This year Golden Week began on April 30th, and ended on May 6th. However we still had classes on May 1st, and 2nd which kind of takes the week out of Golden Week.

He went on to tell me that he went golfing once, in a place called Tsuchiyama 土山 which is only a few minutes from our school by car. He said he did a little farming at his tambo田圃, field, and that he drove a tractor to till some soil to get it ready for planting rice. He talked ever-so-silently because he doesn't like it when teachers hear him speaking in English. Some Japanese have complexes about the proficiency of their English and they don't want to be ridiculed or chided over mispronunciation or incorrect grammar usage.

After that he moseyed on back to his desk situated at the front of the teacher's room and I went back to whatever it was that I was doing at the time. I often look forward to the little chats with kyoto-sensei. I often wonder what he is going to say next.

Banana Girl's Rabbit

As I said in my last post Banana Girl came in after I had given her the banana and brought me a return gift. She had hand made this little rabbit leaf creature with all her artistic skills. I was so proud of that rabbit that I decided to tape it on the screen of my computer at work with double-sided tape.

So without further adieu, meet Banana Girl's rabbit:

And she still asks me if I have any bananas. But now I can tell her truthfully that I don't (because I already ate it... hehehe)